Dee’s story

And here I sit. I looked at my chart and I was confused for a brief second. “PT is a 51 year old woman” Who are they talking about, and why is that on MyChart? Oh! Shit, it’s me. Wow I’ve never been called a “51-year old woman” before, maybe the odd senior discounts here and there but never called out so boldly before.

So here I sit. In the Oncology department of the hospital my mother died in, almost 30 years prior. I have a 2 litre filled pelvic mass that needs to come out, we will only know after the pathology if I need chemo or whatever else.

The only difference between now and 30 years ago was that my mom had me. My mom also had her mom. I sit alone. I could have had my boyfriend come up or called on my sisterhood of friends but this all just feels so deeply personal. In my mind, the only person that should be holding my hand is my mother. And I’m angry she’s not.”