Griefluencers

Have you noticed lately that there are so many folks on social media talking about grief and what you should do with yours? I am definitely not out here telling folks not to talk about grief. I believe so strongly that we’re all better off when we share our stories, our perspectives and our memories. What I don’t love right now is people who are building big followings on social media based on giving you lessons from their grief and how that should apply to yours.

I see a lot of folks talking about how grief should inform your healing and your living. How if you’re grieving you should live intentionally, you should make meaning from your grief…should, should, should. That is way too much pressure to put on a person who is just trying to get through each day without their person.

I have an issue with griefluencers - the idea that we can influence how someone else grieves solely based on our own experience. This is misguided and can be dangerous - people without training in a mental health disciple shouldn’t be out there talking about how other people should heal. It’s irresponsible. This is an unpopular opinion but we need to be clear about our lanes. I don’t talk about my grief to tell you about yours. I talk about my grief because it helps me and hopefully, it makes someone feel less alone. That’s all I’m out here trying to do. I’m not here to tell you how to grieve, or what your life should look like. That’s for you. Haven’t we had enough judgment from other people about what we’re supposed to be doing, feeling, thinking, being? As women, we get this a lot. And now we’re getting it as we grieve. Let’s tune in to folks who have the education and training to know what they’re talking about - mental health professionals who have training in grief and loss. And for those of us consuming grief content on social media there should only be one guiding principal - if it doesn’t resonate or makes you feel judged, click unfollow. It’s that easy.